If You Were to Love Yourself Today, What Would You Do?
In my last blog 3 Nourishing Ways to Cope with Anxiety Induced Indecision, I shared methods to help people solve problems in their life based on listening to their own inner wisdom.
There is, however, as I mentioned at the end of the article, a problem with this:
What happens if you’re some-one who can’t trust your own instincts?
Many people who suffer from anxiety induced indecision, and fear, find it impossible to trust their own wisdom, especially if they’ve experienced years of having their needs and desires undermined or demeaned. However, with practice, it can be done and life can be a whole lot brighter because of it, so it’s worth persevering.
So, How Can This Be Tackled?
How do you learn to trust your own wisdom?
I have to be honest, it’s not easy initially. I first had to begin learning to consciously connect with, and trust, my own wisdom following a breakdown. I was so physically, spiritually, emotionally and mentally shattered by this experience that I lost complete faith in myself.
Whilst these were the internal features of my breakdown, there were also compounding external factors that further knocked my decision making confidence. As I had to leave my job, I fell in to debt causing me to then have to sell my home. As a lone parent, with a young toddler in tow, it was a pretty dark and rocky time. I was terrified of ‘getting things wrong’ – not just for myself but also for my daughter.
As it happens, I did get things wrong. Plenty of things.
Most of the things I got wrong were due to the fact that, in those early stages of recovery, I wasn’t able to listen to, or hear, my inner wisdom. Or have the courage to follow it. At the time, counselling or therapeutic support was financially unviable for me so I had to find my way out of the tunnel on my own.
It was then that I began a long, yet natural and organic, journey to recovery where it was clear that I had to live life at a much slower pace.
One day, as I settled in to this new rhythm, a simple yet profound question, came to my mind. A question that was to change my life:
If I were to love myself today, what would I do?
How Do You Answer This Question When You’re Lacking In Confidence?
I’d like to share with you my simple rituals that I used back then, and still use today, to answer the question. It’s nothing original or new. I didn’t invent it. I guess it’s a fusion of my buddhist practice and how my natural healing process was guiding me at the time but it did help me to alleviate my terror, calm my anxiety and bring peace to my soul at a time when I was in black turmoil. I share it with you in the hope that it brings you support and comfort.
Connecting with Your Inner Wisdom.
If You Were to Love Yourself Today, What Would You do?
Make a Conscious Decision to Live Slowly – Even If It’s For One Hour per Week.
If you live a fast paced life, create time and space within each week to be slow. I don’t mean slumped in front of the TV with a bottle of wine and some chocolate, I mean, consciously slow. Turn this in to a sacred time and place to honour your own highest well being. Then, spending some time alone in this slow time, try some of the following:
Spend Time in Nature.
I can’t tell you strongly enough how healing nature was for me. I often think I walked my way back to wellness and have some special memories of these walks. However, I didn’t just walk during the day, often I walked as dawn was breaking or under the moonlit midnight sky. These magical times helped remind me of the beauty and wonder in life.
Following my walk, I would then come to a place of peaceful meditation. Just sitting quietly with my eyes closed and my body resting. As my body settled, I would breath slowly, gently and calmly. Then, in this quiet place, surrounded by nature, I would:
Listen to My Body.
As my body rested peacefully, I would ask the question:
If I were to love myself today, what would I do?
And then wait.
For all the turmoil or extraneous thoughts to flow away.
They usually do.
With practice, the right answer appears to you.
It sounds so easy but, in the beginning, it isn’t.
So why are these rituals important?
Because they lead to peaceful, calm happiness in life.
Is my life perfect now? Absolutely not. Do I still have days where I’m grumpy and fed up? Yes, of course. Do I still get frustrated. For sure! Do I still struggle to make decisions. Yes. Sometimes.
But, more and more, as I continue to follow these rituals, and listen to my inner wisdom, my life moves towards a peaceful and gentle happiness that I never knew before. For that, I will always be grateful.
I hope it is the same for you.
Please let me know if you try these rituals and ask yourself the question. I’d love to know what answers came to you and if you managed to honour the answer! If so, what happened?! Please share in the comments box below or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Sending You Much Love,
Karen is a #1 Best Selling Author and Spiritual Healer specialising in healing the wounds of the inner child following childhood trauma with the aim to restore self esteem to the highest and most joyful level possible.
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