How to Move From Fear to Confidence.

Breaking Free from The Prison of Upper Limiting Beliefs and Habits.

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I had an insight about upper limiting beliefs and habits. You know – all those fears & terrors, anxieties & confusions that prevent us from embracing our big dreams and feelings of joy, keeping us trapped in gloom and frustration. Even perhaps, when the going gets really tough, sucking us in to a well of  overwhelming depression.

It wasn’t so much a new insight, more a magnification of something I already know. Something in to which I’m continuously re-learning and expanding.

The Insight:

Upper limiting beliefs and habits are always there.

Will always be there.

Perhaps they’re even helpful prompts to keep us moving in the ‘right’ direct as we seem to bump up against them each time we try to move on or up.

I’ve been up against some forceful ones over the last few weeks, mainly in the form of sheer terror which feels like it’s pinning me down to the ground with a large wooden stake.

I’ve found myself wondering:

Is this actually wise guidance warning me against an action that I was hoping to take in my life or is it a limiting belief that I should deal with like a crusader entering in to battle- determined to vanquish this particular foe?

I generally answer this question by listening to the wisdom of my body.nude-1403269_1920

I breath in to it to see what advice it has for me over these debilitating feelings.

Nearly always, it’s a fear of some kind that’s holding me back, pulling me down, ruining the pleasure of my current experience.

Nearly always, it can be traced back to an event in my past, a memory stored that comes unconsciously to life, silently screaming at me: ‘Don’t do it – don’t take that step forward – stay here where it’s nice and safe. It might feel miserable but at least it’s safe.’

Nearly always, I find myself in a period of inner struggle as I decipher the messages and feelings – bringing consciousness to the unconscious.

 Eventually, however, after lots of breathing and deep trusting, a shift occurs.

An awareness.  A new awakening.

A tiny shunt of movement forward, of growth.

I ‘get it’– what the fear is all about. Why the messages  looping around in my mind were trying to keep me locked where I no longer wished to be.

Often, all it takes is one tiny moment of awareness for a giant adjustment to fall in to place, usually accompanied with a sense of relief and enlightenment.That one tiny moment, however, might have taken weeks of work in the darkness, in blindness, in fear, confusion and distrust. Or in grief and sorrow. 

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Mining Into The Dark Caves of My Soul.

Unearthing these insights can be like mining in the dark caves of my soul. Laborious and relentless labouring within until a chink of light finally appears. As that one chink of light arrives, the whole wall of terror can tumble down and pure awareness creeps in, a clear light shines the way forward and I can breath again,walk again, no longer frozen on the pathway of my own life.

Sometimes, I hate those times in the darkness. Those lonely hours spent wondering if this is ‘it’ – have I become permanently stuck on my own journey? Yet time after time I have been shown that I never am – that light always follows the dark. That there is sunshine after rain. There is breath after breathlessness.There is courage after terror. There is self-belief after self-doubt.

Yes. With this liberation comes trust once more. That all is well. That I am well. That life is well.

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Like the Seasons.

This morning, following one such moment of ‘enlightenment’, I woke up truly connecting with the habitual nature of these limiting beliefs:

As one steps in to the light, one takes another step closer to the next wave of darkness.

As one enters in to the darkness, one moves closer to new light.

Like the  rise and fall of the sun and moon, the ebb and flow of the tides, and the rhythm of the earth and her seasons, there will always be a recurring connection with darkness.  This is only a problem if we haven’t realised that this is how life is meant to be.

We can’t have the light without the dark.

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Living in Alignment with the Dark and the Light. 

 Until we come in to alignment with our light and dark and welcome them both in to our life as cherished guides then we will always be stuck in the type of fear and darkness that can never be shifted.

Perhaps this is the greatest awareness of all.

Light and dark are an essential part of life.  

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The darkness is merely a guide to the light. Darkness is, possibly, one of our best friends, a vital part of our wisdom – leading us from the prison within to freedom.

Finding Wisdom in the Darkness.

 I encourage each and everyone of you to sit with your breath today.  Sit with those dark parts of you, whether it is anger, fear, confusion, terror, panic, anxiety, conflict – however it is showing up in your life today, sit with it and ask:

My friend, what is your wisdom for me today?

What are you trying to teach me?

What are you trying to heal within me?

Where is it you wish for me to go?

What is the light in this situation?

Then listen, with gratitude, to this wisdom – and follow its loving guidance.

I  then invite you to do the same again – only, this time, with your light.

Living in Harmony with Your Light – Your Shine.  laughter-1532978_1920

Sit with  your joy, your laughter, your lightness of being, your inner genius, your highest one and ask:

My friend, what is your wisdom for me today?

What are you trying to teach me?

What are you trying to heal within me?

Where is it you wish for me to go?

What is it you wish for me to do?

 Then listen, with gratitude, to this wisdom – and follow.

Don’t be surprised to find that your shine, and your darkness, might both want exactly the same for you!

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A Final Message – Mastering the Darkness.

If you have a history of darkness in your life, suffering from more than your fare share of trauma & grief, depression or sorrow, anxiety and terror, it can become easy to tip in to these feelings when life throws us a curve ball or we step out in to new ventures. But here is something I have learned:

Sometimes we have to ‘master the darkness’.

Sometimes we have to know when to say ‘ enough is enough.’

Sometimes another part of us has to say:

‘ Okay – I can see that you have a message for me so let’s get on and hear it, shall we? I don’t have time to sit around wallowing in old darkness that no longer serves me. Let’s get it up and out. Right here. Right now.’

I admit that this can take some practice.  It becomes easier, however, once you become less afraid of the darkness. Once you realise that it is a friend there to help you. Once you realise that you can be ‘in control’ of it like a good parent rather than letting it control you like a wicked curse.  Ultimately, you are the leader of the pack not the darkness.

It takes practice to believe, understand and to know how to work with but once you have done it a few times, (following the exercises above), it becomes easier and easier –although it doesn’t always feel like that when your in the darkness!

Please trust me:

 It is possible to master the darkness.

If can be done.

Sit tight.

Keep breathing.

And trust.

Darkness is just one half of the scales of your life.

The other half is – light!    flowers-164754_1280

Once you live in alignment with this truth and way of being, you will be on your way to  having broken free of the prison of upper limiting beliefs and habits in order to lose your fear and regain confidence in your life.

I would love to know what wisdom your darkness and/or light  had for you today – what loving advice did it give to you to help you move forward? Please share in the comments below. 

Sending You All Much Love. 

Karen

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Karen is a #1 best selling author,  international clairvoyant & healer specialising in healing the wounds of the inner child following breakdown, trauma or grief in order to restore life to the most joyful place possible.

To work with Karen, visit her ‘Work with Karen’ page:

email: karenpackwood@gmail.com

Visit Karen’s Facebook page: Karen Packwood – The Love Millionaire

or follow her on Twitter: The Love Millionaire@karen_packwood

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” Sometimes, the most profound adventures lie within us and the greatest journey is the journey of our own transformation once we begin to honour our truth.”

Karen Packwood – The Love Millionaire ( to be published in 2017)

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